The catapult that started me writing about this subject most recently was a blog that I started reading (www.cfhusband.blogspot.com). A good friend sent me the link because she knew I would be interested in it from my own story with my friend Emily who has CF. And, she was right! Before I go any further, let me say that I have asked permission from Emily to share this and the CF Husband from the other website has also given permission through his blog to post about it.

Here is the summary of the CF Husband’s blog:
My name is Nathan. My wife, Tricia has Cystic Fibrosis (CF) and had been preparing for a double lung transplant until we discovered we were pregnant. Tricia is the most incredible person I’ve ever met. She keeps me humble and in love. Gwyneth is our beautiful, new, baby girl, born 15+ weeks early. Tricia is on her way back onto the transplant list, and Gwyneth is on her way out of the NICU and into our hearts. This is our story from my perspective…

Here is the summary of Emily’s story:
Emily, who was diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis at 3 months and Jason, her husband, started to look into a lung transplant but that evaluation was put on hold because of the beautiful surprise of pregnancy. It was a mix of emotions since Emily had been told all of her life that she probably would not be able to get pregnant and that it would be a dangerous endeavor for her. God had other plans. About 3 months after the birth of their daughter, Emily’s lung collapsed for the first time, she was hospitalized several times, and continued to have a rapid decline. In June of 2007, the news came that they not only made the double lung transplant list, but were #2 in line for her blood type. She has since had 4 dry runs and is still waiting for new lungs. Since her journey began, it has been a roller coaster of blessings, periods of frustration, and a whole lot of waiting on what God
has next. The faith that she and Jason have, is certainly
enriching ours.

As you can see, and if you read further, there are many similarities. Part 2 is about blogging and Part 3 is about my personal thoughts related to these stories. I first wanted to give you the intro.

So, Part 2…about the blogging side of it. As I read Nate’s posts to get up to date on what was going on, I immediately made the connection to all that he was going through and my Emily’s story. I emailed him just to let him know I was praying for them and to mention Emily in case her journey could be a resource for them. Emily had mentioned several times during her pregnancy of her desire to talk to someone who had lived through what she was going through in her stage of the disease. It was be awesome to see God use their stories for mutual encouragement.

However, as I started to read some comments on the blog and then read the posts that Nathan began to write about some of the comments, I began to see what the end of Part 1 was all about. I’ve seen this on many different sites in the Christian community and it usually is related to a situation that is very difficult, that the future is uncertain, and where the sovereignty of God is called into question because of the pain involved (terminal illness, tragic death of a loved one, death of an infant or child, adoption, etc). As a side note, it is also amazing how many people who do not know Christ are involved in reading these blogs too and how they immediately become evangelistic just because of the essence of the story. It’s also amazing how many people have the “perfect advice” for any given situation that they are going through.

There is also the reality TV side of the blog. I think people have even ‘demanded’ updates from Nathan like we would ‘demand’ a new episode of The Office during the writers strike. People are tuning in and checking their readers often. I am keeping up to date too after being behind for several days. But, the truth is, and this is blunt, once the ‘drama’ dies down, most of us will quit reading. It could partly be because of lack of posts but could it also be that the reading isn’t “as good” as it once was when things move on.

The LBD Dual Significance: Maybe I’m off here but as human beings, we seem to be attracted to the drama of a situation rather than the truth of it. We want to gasp at Satan’s evil schemes rather than wrestling with the sovereignty of God in painful situations. We want to sympathize with someone who is going through our worst fear and be thankful that it’s them and not us and maybe even wonder what they did to cause it to happen rather than trusting God’s sovereignty and that there are many things that are finite brains do not know or understand. My hope is that everyone who reads, is thinking, is praying, is wrestling. I hope that if you comment you think about what you say, you mean it when you say you will pray, and that your focus would be on how awesome God is.

I have admired Nate’s responses as he battles these comments, perceptions, judgments, and opinions. He is also giving due praise to the King of Kings in the midst of it all and not allowing Satan to get credit for the amazing things that God is doing. And although some may say that it is because his girls are both still living, I believe that the God he serves is with Him and is living out exactly what Ephesians 3 is talking about (see end of Part 1). And no matter what God’s plan is in the midst of it all, He is faithful, present, loving, and righteous and from reading Nathan’s thoughts, I am confident that he knows this and is resting in that truth and the life of Christ in him.

I also know that Nate is being very open and vulnerable with their story, a choice that they are making. I personally am very thankful (see Part 3) but it definitely is not the easiest road to take to retain your privacy. However, it appears that Nathan has a bigger vision than retaining their privacy and just surviving in the moments they are living right now. And I hope and pray that whatever that vision is, that He, his family, his community, the world, and Christ would be blessed because of it. It seems like it is already happening.

The Sovereignty of God: For further reading and listening on the sovereignty of God check out the following site and scroll down to the bottom section about Bruce Ware. There are articles as well as two sermons that he presented at Fellowship. He has also written a book titled God’s Greater Glory. I’m not even sure I agree with everything he says in all of this (I might, I just can’t remember) but I do remember it being profound in my wrestling and understanding of God’s sovereignty.

P.S. I know I don’t blog like I am supposed to. Something about being brief and easy to read in 5 minutes with lots of tags so you can pick and choose what you want to read, etc. (By the way, I think there is danger in reading this way. You may really miss what the author is trying to convey. Another blog post, another day.) Mine do look longer than they actually are because of how my page is formated and the size of my text (I’m thinking about changing this when and if I move to wordpress), but I really don’t care that much to make it convenient for you. Gosh, I’m ornery today but I’m not in a bad mood!

This Virtual Reality post is actually one of three or four at the moment. Part 1 was me shortening my thoughts from the whole post!!! I’m wordy and I’m thorough. I’ve never denied that. Part 2 and 3 will come soon, I’ve just run out of time to complete them today but I’m telling you this to force myself to complete it. I’ve wanted to write the content of Part 1 since before I mentioned it on my Funk post back in September, then titled The Net Community. So stay tuned, in a non-reality TV kind of way. Actually, if I was a reality TV show, my ratings would probably be so bad it would be kicked off the air! Just kidding…ok ornery to a bad joke. I better stop for the day!

P.P.S. I’m pretty sure the mice are gone. I haven’t heard them and I bet their frozen if they aren’t poisoned. Yeah!

So I’ve been in a little blogging funk. I have a little yellow notepad with almost three pages worth of ideas and thoughts but nothing is really coming together to form what I would call a complete post. So I’m feeling funky…and not in the dancing kind of way.

I guess I will consider this sparse time a great opportunity to do “research”. It might also be a good respite for those of you feeling like you’ve been spending a little too much time reading my blog. Please keep reading though.

Here…I’ll whet your appetite with the soon to be posts:

Top 10 List
Encouraging Words
The Net Community
Light vs. Dark
Conflict Resolution

The LBD Dual Significance: If I currently had this figured out, you would not have a post titled “Funk”.

Ok, so no one knows I’m doing this whole blog thing. I’m not sure I’m gonna tell anyone either. Probably eventually…but for now, I’ll keep this on the down low and see if anyone comes across it. Daniel put together this website after our summer travels last year and we have not used it since. I went to start up a wordpress blog but “life by design” was already taken and that was the only name I could think of. It’s almost like you have to have all of your thoughts together before you even start blogging! Isn’t blogging getting your thoughts out of your mind and into something legible? I know, I know, there is a lot more to this whole thing and I am green so I need to shut up and learn. So, now I’m starting on our on website. I’m really excited about this though. I have a lot of deep thoughts running through my head and this way I don’t have to just hold them in and keep them private between me and God, but I can share them with my own world. My husband will probably appreciate it to because I tend to get a little deep for him! I’m working on my…ummm…superficial conversation skills. They just don’t come very easily for me.